Holding My Last Breath
by ghostgirl208
Summary: MAJOR TRIGGER WARNING FOR ATTEMPTED SUICIDE! Oswald finds out about Edward's scheme of revenge. Remorseful and heartbroken, He makes an attempt on his own life just as Edward finds him after discovering the truth of Isabella. Oswald survives but with reprecussions.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Just Sleep

It wasmidnight at the Van Dahl mansion. Oswald had been awake most of the night drinking wine and worrying about Edward. He had been gone since he tried to confess his love for him. Oswald knew it was because of him somehow. Besides, who in their right mind would love someone like him? He took another swig and relaxed against the couch. He had recently heard a rumour that Ed knew about Isabella and that he was going to kill him for it. That all this time he had been mentally tormenting him with his father, the memories of their friendship, and his feelings for Edward. Oswald himself couldn't believe Ed would do such a thing but it oddly enough made sense. He supposed he did deserve it after all. Oswald slowly stood up, legs shaky and head swimming from the alcohol in his system. He knew Ed was going to kill him, but he didn't want him to.

He knew it would only make things worse for him. 'I have to...there's no choice now.' He thought to himself as he stumbled up the stairs, heart aching from the depression and the realization that Ed probably never cared for him and that perhaps he had destroyed the one person he cared about. His emotions were conflicted, heartbroken and mostly remorseful. He knew this was for the best. Slowly Oswald limped into the bathroom, staring at himself in the mirror. He looked tired, sickly pale and ragged. He made a face of pure disgust at himself. 'Look at you. You're weak! And filthy! You'd be better off dead freak!' His mind screamed. Oswald swallowed his anxiety down as he limped toward the bath tub and began filling it with ice cold water.

Then Oswald reached for a bottle of sleeping pills and opened the cap. He looked at the small blue capsules swallowing and closing his eyes. He tipped his head back and started to swallow as many pills as he could. There was only one pill left in the bottle when he was done. Almost immediately Oswald felt the effects, stumbling backwards and feeling sick. He nearly fell into the bath tub as it started to over flow. He shivered from the cold water, slowly letting himself sink underneath the cold depths, spots of black invading his vision. The last thought he had was of Edward Nygma, how he would light up the room with his bright smile or tell him his annoying yet endearing riddles. He found himself smiling softly as his eyes began to close. 'Goodbye my love..' was the last coherent thought Oswald had before the darkness consumed him.

Meanwhile, Edward Nygma was barreling through the streets in a panic. He had done a little digging despite himself about his now dead girlfriend Isabella. It turned out she had been an assassin created by Hugo Strange to distract him from protecting Oswald. For what purpose Edward didn't know yet, but he would find out but right now he had to get home to Oswald. When Edward arrived at the mansion, it was eerily quiet. "Oswald? Oswald I need to talk to you!" Edward called. He felt his heart pounding in anxiety, fear making his stomach churn as he started climbing upstairs. "Oswald? Oswald are you alright?" Ed could feel guilt creeping up inside him. Whatever happened, Ed had probably been the cause. He had planned a convoluted scheme of revenge against the only person he cared about, the one person who had stuck by him through the worst of it.

And if Oswald decided to kill him for it he knew he deserved it. Edward made it to Oswald's bedroom, the sound of water over flowing reaching his ears. Before he went to investigate he found a note addressed to him on the night stand. Curious, he picked it up and read it. _"Dear Edward, I'm sorry it has come to this. I understand you're probably furious right now and I don't blame you. I should have told you when I had the chance. Even though I knew you could never love me. All I ever did was hurt you and I'm sorry for that. Please understand that my death is for the best. I know you probably think killing me yourself would make you feel better but it wouldn't. So I suppose I decided to take it upon myself. What's life worth without the one you love? Forgive me Edward."_

Edward dropped the note, heart sinking and eyes going wide. 'Oswald...loved him? But...oh dear..he..he's trying to oh dear!' Edward thought in terror as he ran into the bathroom, nearly tripping on the soaked tile, gasping when he saw tufts of spiky black hair poking from the over flowing bath tub. "OSWALD!" Edward screamed, running and turning off the faucet and attempting to pull Oswald's waterlogged body out of the tub. "Oswald wake up! Please please wake up!" Edward begged, holding him close to his chest, tears starting to pour down his cheeks as he stroked Oswald's pale face. Suddenly Oswald started shaking and foaming at the mouth. Edward tried desperately to hold him still, sobbing loudly.

"Oswald! Oswald no! Please no! I'm going to get you help I promise!" Edward said as he hurriedly picked the small man up in his arms before running outside and to his car. "Please stay with me Oswald...I won't fail you again!" He said as he pressed a kiss to Oswald's forehead as he buckled him into the passenger seat and quickly getting into the driver's side. He turned the key in ignition and tore down the road. He could hear Oswald making choking and gasping sounds, like he couldn't breathe.

"Hang on Oswald! I'm almost at the hospital! Please don't die on me!" Edward begged as he got closer to the hospital, hearing Oswald cough and groan, his breathing slowing. "Don't you fucking die on me Oswald Cobblepot! Don't you dare!" Edward yelled, his voice becoming high pitched as tears continued flowing down his cheeks, causing some of the street lights to blur. When he finally reached the hospital, Edward jumped out of the car and ran to Oswald's side picking him up and running inside. "Help! Someone help me please! The Mayor is dying!" Edward cried as a nurse ran and took Oswald strapping him to a gurney.

Edward fought to follow him, soon being forced into the waiting room. As the hours ticked on Edward started pacing, sobbing and pulling at his hair. 'What have I done? He loved me! And I just killed him! And for what? Some ghost? What the hell is wrong with me?' Edward yelled at himself, his body shaking with sobs. I'm sorry Oswald! I'm so sorry!' It was all his fault, if he had not even spoken to that woman, Oswald wouldn't have hurt himself like that! Edward let out a small whimper as he curled up on a couch in the waiting room.

Edward barley registered angry footsteps charging toward him, too lost in his grief. "WHAT DID YOU DO?" The angered voice of Jim Gordon yelled, grabbing Edward up by his collar and pushing him against the wall. "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO HIM NYGMA!" Jim spat, shaking a crying Edward. "I...I made a mistake...I'm sorry...he loved me and I..I tried to hurt him.." he whimpered, voice cracking. "You miserable son of a bitch!" Jim started, only to be held back by Bullock despite his struggles. "It's not worth it Jim! Relax! Harvey tried as Jim glared daggers at Edward who cowered against the wall.

"I'm sorry...I'm so so sorry." He uttered, looking up at them in fear and remorse. "O-Oswald nearly killed himself...there were some pills he had overdosed on.." Edward said in a small whimpering voice. Jim stared him down. "He attempted suicide. Why?" He asked in a low growl. Edward sniffled, wiping his eyes. "He..he hasn't been taking care of himself...since I left..." Edward said sadly, trying not to show how weak and hurt he really was. "Why did you leave him? Did you know he was going to hurt himself?" Jim asked, his voice dangerously low. Edward gulped, eyes watering. "N-no...I didn't.." Edward said. "I swear I didn't know.." He repeated. Jim seemed to accept that answer as he started to calm down.

"You hurt him somehow..didn't you?" Jim asked curiously. Edward slowly nodded, a look of regret on his face. "Yes...I did...he loved me..trusted me even...and I betrayed him." Edward whispered, eyes downcast. Jim sighed, crossing his arms. "I won't ask how or why, but if Oswald survives, you may want to leave Gotham. He doesn't take betrayal lightly. I was lucky." He said quietly before shaking his head. "Sorry I spooked you Nygma. Take care." Though Jim didn't really look sorry at all as he and Bullock stalked off, going to question the doctors, leaving Edward to his own thoughts. "Mr Nygma?" A doctor called, causing Edward to raise his head and hurry toward him.

"Oswald..how is he? Is he okay?" Ed asked almost desperately. The doctor sighed sadly. "Mr Cobblepot is in stable condition yes. But I'm afraid I have some terrible news." The doctor said sadly. Edward looked at him, his heart pounding in anxiety. "Oh dear...he's not..he's not going to...?" Ed bit his lip, trying not to cry. "I'm sorry but...we had to pump his stomach. He had alot of drugs and alcohol in his system. We tried to flush out as much of it as we could. But there may be some side effects." he explained. Edward gulped, tears escaping from his eyes as he tried to wrap his mind around what he was being told. "Side effects?" he asked in a hushed tone. The doctor lowered his head. "He may end up in a vegetative state for the rest of his life Mr Nygma. The other outcome is that he may not even remember you. I'm sorry." Edward felt his legs nearly give out as the implications sunk in, he swallowed sitting down and tried to breathe but he felt like he was gasping for air, he felt nauseaus. "You may see him if you wish. But be warned, he's currently on life may not look like how you remember him." The doctor explained as he lead Edward toward Oswald's hospital room.

The second Edward saw him, cables all around him, heart monitor beeping next to him. Edward hurried to Oswald's side, near tears. "I'll leave you two alone." The doctor said, closing the door behind him. Edward felt his throat tighten up as he watched the former mob boss, his breathing shallow, his skin deathly pale. He looked weak, fragile like a sick baby bird that might not make it. Edward took Oswald's pale and cold hand in his and finally the dam broke. "Oh god..Oswald I'm so sorry! This is all my fault...I..I hurt you..but I was so mad at you because of Isabella..I wasn't thinking..I was too consumed by rage to think about what I was doing..I failed you..I said I'd do anything for you..I meant it Oswald.." Edward sniffled, squeezing Oswald's limp hand as sobs wracked his tall frame. "I'm so sorry..why did you do it?! why did you have to..!?" he whimpered, sobbing and hiccuping. "You could've just said something!" Edward said shaking with sobs, he laid his head on Oswald's arm, crying softly. "I...I would've t-told you! Why didn't you say anything?!" he wailed. Oswald's eyes twitched slightly, the tube down his throat helping him breathe, his black hair plastered to his forehead. "I'm sorry Oswald..please come back to me.." Edward begged, his sobs growing softer as he wore himself out.

 **I'm sorry the first chapter is so sad. There's bound to be more sadness ahead but Oswald will make it! He's been through worse after all. Ed will also be exploring his feelings for Oswald too!**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Heal.

Edward spent the next few days at the hospital, never leaving Oswald's side. He hardly slept, choosing instead to memorize Oswald's face. Sometimes Jim would visit, always giving him a look of sympathy before shaking his head and leaving. Edward felt anxious knowing Barbara, Tabitha and Butch might find out that he'd double crossed them as he'd refused to answer any of their calls. He had gotten texts asking if he'd killed him to which he'd hope they'd take the hint and realize that Edward wasn't coming back. When he did close his eyes he'd see Oswald's scared face, reaching out to him, clinging to him. Sometimes Edward would be holding him in his arms, smiling as the light faded from his eyes and he closed them forever. Edward would cry and beg him to stay, not wanting to let him go. But despite his efforts, Oswald always died in his arms. Then he'd wake up, frantically checking Oswald's unconcious form. Edward would place his hand on Oswald's chest, feeling the man's heart beating beneath it and he'd sigh in relief. The doctor told him that Oswald might wake up soon and Edward needed to be the first person he saw. He wanted to be able to look into those beautiful green and blue eyes again. He had to. Edward had never realized how important Oswald was to him, until he'd gone too far and hurt him for it. He didn't know if he loved him back, but he was willing to find out. Edward smiled at Oswald, now free of the breathing tube, able to breath on his own now. He gently stroked his cheek which was slowly returning to it's former healthy shade. "Wake up soon Os. I'll be right here when you do." he said, leaning over to press a kiss to his forehead. Edward yawned, resting his head on Oswald's arm once more.

As the hours ticked on, Oswald started twitching, eyes fluttering. He let out a small groan, feeling weak, his head swimming as he struggled to open his eyes, wincing at the bright light above him. 'What..? what happened to me..? What's going on..?' he thought, his head hurt when he tried to remember. He felt pressure on his arm, someone breathing. Oswald's eyes fluttered once more, finally opening them looking around what looked like a hospital room in confusion. Then he saw a tall, lanky, brown haired man sleeping on his arm. "Hey...Hey sir?" Oswald asked as he attempted to shake the man awake. "Sir..wake up." Oswald said, his voice raspy and a little harsh. The man almost instantly woke up, smiling excitedly when he saw him. "OSWALD!" the man cried and instantly wrapped his arms tightly around him which caused Oswald to let out a soft gasp in surprise as he awkwardly hugged the odd stranger back.

"Uh...do..do we know each other?" Oswald asked, taken aback. And what had he called him? 'Oswald'? He remembered nothing of his past, not even his own name! So how on earth did this odd man know him? He felt said man tense and pull away, looking at him with concern in his noticeably brown eyes. "You..you don't remember me? It's Edward..Edward Nygma..you're in the hospital..you..you tried to.." The man, Edward started to tear up, a choked sob escaping him. "I..I'm sorry sir but..I..I don't even know who I am." Oswald said feeling sorry for him. Oswald noticed the man hadn't slept very well, his glasses were crooked, his hair a mess and his outfit was clearly a disaster in itself. 'This Edward fellow must really adore green..' Oswald thought with distaste. Edward looked at him dejected and gulped. "Your name is Oswald Chesterfield Cobblepot..you're the current mayor of Gotham...and I'm your Chief of Staff Edward Nygma.." he explained while Oswald listened intently. "Oswald..Okay..wait I'm the mayor?" Oswald asked in disbelief. It wasn't everyday someone would wake up to finding out they were in a position of power. It was surprising to Oswald because he wasn't really too happy with the idea. There was something off, like he had a feeling around Nygma but he couldn't decipher it. Edward smiled and nodded once more.

"Yes..yes you are. We're best friends. You actually used to be a crime boss. That's how we met. Some people always called you Penguin because of your limp." Now that had Oswald looking at him with surprise as he attempted to move his leg only to wince. "I..I have a broken leg.." he said, shock and slight terror on his face. "You told me Fish Mooney beat you with a chair and broke it. I used to massage it for you so it would soothe the pain." Edward explained. Oswald nodded slowly, taking a breath. "Where..where do I live?" Oswald asked, biting his lip and feeling vulnerable. Edward smiled and reached to squeeze his shoulder only to pull his hand back and stare at his feet. "You live in a mansion..you inherited it from your father." Edward explained. Oswald took a breath as he tried to remember him, but all he could get were blanks. Oswald let out a sigh in frustration, closing his eyes and trying to shut out the incoming headache.

"Um..Mr Nygma? do we..do we live together?" Oswald asked, feeling a little queasy as Edward smiled brightly. "Yes! Yes we do!" he said, excitement in his voice. Oswald sighed, trying not to yell at him for shouting. 'Whoever I was, he sure seemed to miss me..' Oswald thought looking at Nygma with a slight frown. "Interesting. I assume you'll help me recover my memories?" he asked, fiddiling with the hospital blanket. Edward nodded once more, a bit slowly as he bit his lip. "Yes..yes I believe I will Oswald." Edward said, voice low with a hint of sadness. Oswald looked at him curiously until Edward seemed to shake himself out of it. "I think I'll go and let the doctor know you're awake. Hopefully they'll tell me when you're due home." Edward said as he stood up on shaky legs, giving him another small smile as he walked toward the door. "Did you uh..need anything? Like a soda or something?" Edward asked in a nervous manner. Oswald was about to refuse only to realize how dry his mouth and throat was. "Yes actually. A uh coke would be nice." Oswald said.

Edward nodded as he stepped out into the hallway. "One coke coming up. I won't be long." Edward said with a smile before he closed the door behind him, emitting a small sigh of relief. 'He'll be fine..he's going to be just fine.' Edward tried to assure himself as he started looking for the doctor. 'But what about when he finds out about..what I tried to do?' he thought nervously. Suddenly Edward's phone buzzed loudly in his pocket and he groaned in annoyance until he saw the number and his eyes went wide. Barbara had called him, probably wondering if he'd killed Oswald. He knew she would be pissed but at this point he didn't honestly care. Oswald had nearly killed himself because of his foolishness and he was more focused on helping him regain his health. Edward opened his flip phone, holding it to his ear as he went into the room with the vending machines. Almost instantly, Barbara's bubbly voice was heard on the other end. "Sooo did you do it Nygma? Is our little bird sleeping with the fishes?" she asked making Edward bite his lip. "No. Change of plans actually. I found some new information recently." he explained as he grabbed a can of coke for Oswald. He heard Barbara give a huff in frustration.

"New information?! We had a deal Nygma!" she said aggravated. Edward sighed as he sat down, placing the coke on a table next to him. "Isabella wasn't even a real person. She was a cloned assassin sent from god knows where. My best guess is that Strange sent her here. I want to know what she was after." Barbara scoffed in disbelief. "Where did you find this out?" she asked. "When I went to clean out her apartment. She had left some things for me so I decided I would go and pick them up. There was a file from Indian Hill with her name on it labeling her Project X19." he explained. There was a long pause until Barbara spoke up again. "Damn. You sure know where to find the crazies don't you sweetie?" she asked in a pitying tone. Edward swallowed a lump in his throat, biting his lip. "I..I should've known..she looked just like her..I should have realized what was right in front of me." he heard Barbara sigh on the other end. "What happened to Penguin?" she asked. Edward lowered his head, wincing. "He..he tried to kill himself..he knew...Barbara he knew I was the one tormenting him..I knew he had suicidal tendencies it's just...I thought.." Edward shook his head, covering his head.

"Something like that doesn't just go away Nygma. It takes time. And you knew about it? I had no idea." Barbara said, starting to sound bored. "Listen, I may still need your help. I need to find out who did this. Oswald has lost his memories and someone needs to pay for this." Edward said trying to keep an even tone. Barbara scoffed in annoyance. "Eddie, honey I still want Penguin's blood..you haven't given me that so our deal just expired." she said simply. Edward growled in frustration. "Miss Keane I'd like for you to reconsider.." he started until he was cut off. "Threats won't work darling. You're gonna have to try something else." she said threateningly. Edward sighed, until he scowled. "What if it had been Tabitha? What if a clone of Jim Gordon appeared manipulating you and she killed him out of jealousy? And he had pit the two of you against each other? Don't you think you'd want to find out why?" Edward said half shouting. There was another long pause until he heard Barbara sniffle. "I guess I would be just as angry as you..however..I think that's already happening." she said in a quiet voice. "Help me then maybe I can figure out something with Butch okay?" Edward asked. He heard Barbara sigh.

"Alright. Fine. We'll help you." she finally said. Edward felt himself grin. "Good. Thank you. I should get back to Oswald. I'll talk later." Edward hung up, sliding his flip phone back into his pocket before he stood up and hurried to Oswald's room. When he opened the door he found Oswald lying on his side, fast asleep. Edward had to admit, he looked cute all snuggled up under the covers. He smiled as he placed the soda can on a table next to Oswald's bed and sat down at his side, his hand reaching out to gently push his black bangs out of his eyes, holding his breath nervously as he let his hand linger. Oswald whined a little, nuzzling against Ed's hand as though some part of him remembered him still. It made Edward's heart flutter and his face go red. "I know you don't remember me Oswald..but I want you to know that everything will be okay. I have no ill intentions toward you..I know you won't trust me for awhile and I understand that. I promise I will explain everything to you soon." Edward bit his lip nervously before he placed a soft kiss on Oswald's cheek, smiling as he let out a soft grumble, snuggling the pillow.

Meanwhile, Oswald was having an odd dream. He saw himself being forced into the trunk of a car, a man roughly pulling him out, shoving him towards the end of the docks. His voice was rough and angry. "Don't ever come back to Gotham." he had said and then s loud gunshot rang in his ears and Oswald yelped, his vision blurred from being underwater. Then it changed, he was holding a dying woman in his arms, she had tears in her eyes as she smiled at him. Then he was in a car, gunfire all around him. He let out a terrified scream as he finally woke up, his heart racing. "Oswald! It's okay it was only a dream." The man from earlier, Edward said, holding his hands. Oswald looked at him as focused his vision. "I..I had been..shot..I think..I saw someone die.." Oswald rambled, shaking from shock. "It's okay Oswald..I promise everything's okay." Edward said. Oswald slowly calmed down, soft tremors still going through him. "It..it felt...familiar..like I was there before.." Oswald said in a small whisper. Edward gulped nervously. "What..what did you see?" Oswald swallowed. "Water. Someone shot a gun near me and pushed me in..then I was holding a woman in my arms..I felt a connection to her..like I knew her all my life.." Oswald said, looking down.

Edward rubbed his arm with a soft smile. "Perhaps you are remembering. The doctor said you'd be able to leave tomorrow possibly. You've healed quite a bit!" he said happily. Oswald nodded slowly, deep in thought as flashes of a previous life seemed to pass through his mind even while he was awake. "Alright..could you pass me my coke?" he asked. Edward nodded quickly, opening it and handing it to him. Oswald took it and quickly took a few sips, coughing from the fizz. "Thank you." Oswald said, as he placed it on the table and leaned back. "Try going back to sleep Oswald. I'll be here." Edward said, holding his hand as Oswald drifted to sleep once more. Edward yawned as he too relaxed, looking at the sleeping Penguin with a small adoring smile. He was unsure what these knew feelings for the smaller man were but it definitely wasn't platonic. He was too blind to realize it before but, could he have fallen for the former mob boss? It was likely but he also considered the fact that Oswald may not return his feelings anymore when he regains his memory. That thought alone caused his smile to fade and his heart to sink.

He knew he didn't deserve Oswald's love, not after what he had done. At the time, he thought he had been justified but now, he felt like he had purposely hurt the one person who adored him, and possibly pushed him away forever all for a dead woman's face. Someone he barely knew. He hoped Oswald would forgive him after he regained his memory. If not, he decided he would be happy with whatever happened to him. Slowly, Edward rested his head on Oswald's arm, falling into a peaceful slumber.

 **I hope you guys enjoyed this. It'll get darker in later chapters. But don't worry, i have some fluff planned. :)**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Going Home

Oswald was released from the hospital the next morning, Edward wheeled him out with a wheelchair to his car. It was cloudy with a high chance of rain that morning, which was why Edward had grabbed Oswald's umbrella in case so it wouldn't rain on him. Edward helped Oswald in the back of the car, only for Oswald to grumble at him slightly. "I can do it Edward! I'm fine!" he said in a slightly annoyed tone. Edward sighed, giving him a look of concern. "I'm sorry, I'm just worried about you." he replied. Oswald managed to hoist himself into the back of the car, giving him a look. "Thank you sir, but I'm quite capable of taking care of myself." he said in a sassy tone. Edward couldn't help but smile a little despite his heart sinking from Oswald's rejection. He closed the door as Oswald buckled himself in, going to the driver's side. Edward turned the car in ignition and started to drive from the hospital as it began to rain down upon Gotham City. Oswald looked out the window, eyeing the citizens as they walked on the sidewalks, catches images of himself holding an umbrella and walking down those very streets. Edward couldn't help but glance at him in the mirror every once in awhile. He looked so different now than when he had first met him. He looked lost, like he didn't know where he was. He wished Oswald could still remember him. Perhaps a part of him did. He almost teared up when he thought about what the doctor had told him. "There's a chance he could never recover his memories Mr Nygma. He may remember bits and pieces but that may be it." Edward blinked away his tears as he focused on the road ahead. "Are you okay Edward?" Oswald's voice asked him, a small quiet sound. Edward sniffed, giving him a fake smile.

"Yeah I'm fine." he said, glancing at him through the mirror. Soon Edward pulled up at the large Van Dahl mansion, parking the car and stepping out. Oswald looked up at it in wide eyed wonder, wondering how on earth could he have lived here. "My parents must have been rich." Oswald said as he unsteadily got out of the car, wincing as he stood on his broken leg and started to limp toward the front door, only for Edward to gently take him by the arm. "Let me help you up the stairs. The doctor said you shouldn't be on your feet so much." Edward said, making Oswald roll his eyes yet, he felt an odd sense of warmth when he touched him. "Alright, fine." Oswald said, hoping he wouldn't notice how his cheeks turned red. Edward helped him inside, Oswald looked around observing the inside of the mansion. "Its...it's huge...how did I ever find my way around?" Oswald asked in disbelief. Edward smiled as he led him to the couch by the fire place. "Well you knew it like the back of your hand...you used to live here with your father and his wife and and her children." Edward said as he sat Oswald down, sitting next to him. "Was..was she my mother?" Oswald asked curious about his family. "No no no, you told me Grace was your step mother. She and her nasty brood abused you daily." Edward explained as Oswald gave a look of hurt.

"Then..who is my mother? Did I..did I tell you about her?" he asked hoping to at least recover some memories of his parents. At this, Edward gave him a soft look of sadness. "You said you're mother's name was Gertrud. She was killed in your arms." he said, Oswald closed his as a flash of the dying woman in his dreams forced it's way into his brain. "She was kidnapped and..I failed to rescue her." Oswald said with a frown. "And my father?" Edward looked down sadly. "He was poisoned by your step mother...He's been gone for awhile Oswald. I'm sorry." he said. Oswald swallowed as he felt his heart sink, memories of his parents deaths hitting him full force. "My mother liked lilies..you tended her grave.." Oswald spoke quietly. Edward nodded slowly with a soft smile. "Not just that. When you had been shot in the woods I rescued you and took you to my apartment..I helped you to heal up." Edward said, gently taking Oswald's hand as the smaller man looked at him, feeling warmth in his stomach despite his best efforts to quash it.

"I..I think I would like to go to bed Ed..I feel exhuasted." Oswald said, hiding his budding attraction to the man. there was no way Oswald should be feeling this for some stranger. What if he was a stalker? Or worse, some crazed man trying to lure him into a false sense of security? Oswald didn't like being manipulated, especially by some stranger claiming they were friends. Oswald didn't even know if he could trust this guy. Edward nodded with a genuine smile. "Of course you must be exhausted! I'll get you to your room." he said as helped Oswald up and started leading him upstairs. When they went up to Oswald's bedroom his jaw dropped. It was large with a king sized bed in the middle of the room and a vanity at the corner of the room. "I sleep in here?" Oswald asked as he limped toward the bed, feeling the satin covers. "Um...would you uh.." Oswald turned to Ed nervously, trying to tell him he needed privacy. Luckily Edward seemed to take the message as he ducked his head with a blush. "Oh yes, Sorry. I'll be downstairs if you need me." he said, stepping out and closing the door behind him.

Oswald took in the large room, his eyes landing on a picture on his desk. Curious he picked it up and looked it over, eyes widening when he realized it was a picture of Edward. 'Did I..I didn't..I don't like him do I? No way!' Oswald thought shaking his head dismissively. Though he couldn't shake the strange feeling of utter and complete happiness whenever he looked at him. He wished he could remember! Oswald wanted to know why Ed always had that sad, faraway look in his eyes whenever he looked at him or why he always held that sense of regret. Oswald had to wonder, did Ed try to hurt him before he lost his memories? If so, maybe Oswald needed to get away from him after he regained his memories. But for now, Oswald would stay until he figured who he was again. Yawning, he found some silky pajamas and quickly got changed. Meanwhile, Edward sat at the kitchen table, sipping some coffee and checking his messages. He had a few ignored messages from Barbara and her group but there was one number that Edward didn't recognize. Curious, he called the number back, wanting to find out who it was. Soon, a voice answered that made Edward's blood run ice cold.

"Hello son. Glad you decided to give your old man a call. Go get your little bird friend and bring him to us. If you don't, he's dead!" then dial tone and Edward slowly dropped the phone, his eyes starting to water as he shakily stood up. 'Oh dear...he found me..and he's after Oswald!' Edward paled and ran upstairs, running and bursting through Oswald's bedroom door. "Oswald." He called, only to soften his voice when he saw Oswald still fast asleep. Slowly Edward walked towards him, noticing Oswald was laying on his side, back facing Ed. Edward nudged his shoulder gently, trying to wake him. "Oswald..Oswald wake up.." Edward said in a soft voice. Slowly,Oswald woke up turning to face him. "E-Ed? What's going on? Are you alright?" Edward gave a soft sigh. "I'm fine Oswald..I just...needed to check on you." Edward said lamely. Oswald slowly sat up, smiling at him. "I appreciate your concern Ed but I'm fine." he said, feeling that warmth rising in his chest once more. Oswald swallowed the impulse to touch Ed's hands, somehow thinking he wouldn't want him touching him.

Edward seemed to stare at him, finally sighing. "Sorry if..I'm too close." he said, watching Oswald shift away from him. He could tell Oswald seemed uncomfortable, scared even. Like he wasn't sure if he could be trusted. Edward didn't blame him, he may not remember but he still had every right to be suspicious. Oswald's look softened the slightest bit. "It's fine uh..Ed.." he said, moving as far from Ed as he could. "Do you...do you know why..I can't remember anything?" he asked curiously, analyzing him. Edward shifted, swallowing. 'Should I lie? he could find out eventually...no..maybe I could just..alter it..say it was an accident.' Ed thought to myself. Maybe it was a good thing Oswald didn't remember, that meant they could start over, move forward. They could pretend nothing terrible ever happened and Ed could shove all the terrible things he had done to him in the large closet inside his mind. Ed decided to help him regain the memories that mattered over the ones of betrayal and heartbreak. It was better this way.

Edward gulped once more and smiled sadly. "You..you were poisoned. It was...a chemical poisoning and you were sick for months. I found you one night, scared and out of your mind. So I took you to the hospital." he said sounding sincere. Oswald looked at him in shock. "S-someone poisoned me? Do you know who?" Oswald asked in shock, eyes wide. "That's what I'm working on finding out. Whoever did this to you won't get away with it." Edward said, hoping Oswald wouldn't realize he was telling a white lie. But he didn't want him to know he had been the one to betray him, he knew it would break his heart. He might even try and hurt himself again if he knew and Edward didn't want to chance it. Oswald started smiling at him, relaxing and moving a bit closer to him. "Well, thank you Ed for..saving my life. We must have been really good friends." he said with a small shy smile. Edward smiled back with a blush. "Yes..yes we were..we are..I care alot about you Oswald." he said,staring at Oswald's eyes. 'Were his eyes always so pretty? It's like..looking into an ocean and a forest at the same time..' Edward noted an overwhelming feeling of warmth starting to consume him.

Edward gulped, looking away nervously. "I should uh..go and get dinner started.." Edward said getting up and starting to walk out the door, looking over his shoulder at him. "Uh..did..did you want anything special?" he asked. Oswald started to fidget with his blanket some. "Um..I don't know..some steak would be nice.." he said, suddenly feeling a bit shy. Edward smiled as he stepped out into the hall. "I wont be too long." he said, closing the door and leaning against it. 'Oh dear..what have I done? I lied to him..again..But I had too! The truth would kill him! I can't lose him again...Its best he never remembers..I don't want to hurt him anymore..' Edward thought to himself as he made his way to the kitchen alone with his conflicting thoughts and emotions. 'You're only digging yourself a deeper hole Eddie.' the dark voice in the back of his mind spoke. Edward grimaced.

"It's best he never finds out...we are moving forward." Edward said. 'But what happens if I do find out Ed?' a voice that sounded like Oswald's whispered to him mockingly. "You won't..I can make sure of it..I'm doing it to protect you.." Edward said, as he started to cook the steak. "I'm never telling you what happened..it's only going to hurt you and you're better off.." he said. 'Or maybe you're doing this to avoid responisibility..'the dark voice said once more, causing Ed to swallow nervously. "N-not true...as far as he knows, Isabella never existed, I never chose her over him...I never betrayed him..he'll never know.." he said, not so sure anymore. But Ed knew Oswald would find out someday, he just hoped it wouldn't be for a long time. Soon Ed finished cooking and quickly set the table, pouring some wine in two glasses and calling for Oswald.

Meanwhile, Oswald was looking in the mirror, wearing one of the fine suits he'd found. 'I must have had expensive tastes.' he thought as he smiled at his reflection, messing with his spiky black hair. His thoughts shifted to the tall young man downstairs. Edward Nygma. He must have really cared about him. Oswald always had this strange feeling of warmth whenever he looked into those soft brown eyes. He wondered, did he feel it too? Something in his brain was telling him no, but another part of him believed he did. Soon he heard his name being called and the smell of steak and mashed potatoes wafted upstairs. Oswald quickly limped downstairs, wincing from the throbbing pain in his leg. When he went to the dining table he gasped as he felt a painful throbbing in his skull, he let out a whimper of pain, clutching his head as a memory hit him.

 _He saw himself sitting at the table, a nervous smile on his face. There was a large dinner laid out in front of him, with romantic music playing softly in the background. He was waiting for someone. Someone he needed to confess to. He could hear himself speak but it was fuzzy. As more time went on he became anxious and worried. Oswald wondered, would he ever show up?_ Oswald gasped as he was pulled from the memory as two long arms wrapped around him. "Oswald? Are you alright?" he heard Edward say through the fog. Oswald slowly nodded, gulping slightly. "Y-yes..I think so.." he said in a nervous voice, allowing Ed to lead him to a seat at the table. "Are you sure? You look like you've seen a ghost." Edward said with a smile as he cut up some steak for him and some mashed potatoes and string beans before getting himself some. Oswald looked at him curiously. "Was I...was I ever..dating someone?" he asked, still thinking about the odd memory. Edward blanched in shock.

"Uh...well uh...not really...but you did fall in love once.." Ed said a fond yet nervous smile on his face. Oswald bit his lip, studying the man sitting next to him. "Who was it?" he asked, wanting to know who this secret love interest was. 'Whoever it is they need to know I'm okay..' Edward swallowed, looking at him. "I...well I don't know..but you always told me he was tall, handsome.." he trailed off, picking at his food. Oswald looked at him for a moment before he hummed and continued to eat his food. They sat there in silence for the next few moments, with Edward sometimes glancing at Oswald shyly. Oswald would sometimes glance back, wondering what was going on in his companion's head. After dinner, Edward led Oswald back to his room, giving him a long hug goodnight before the odd man returned to his bedroom. As Oswald laid in bed, he decided he would find out who this mysterious crush was and if he knew he was alive at least. Meanwhile, Edward laid in bed, smiling at his revalation. 'I think I may be in love with him...we can start over together..fate has given me a second chance and I'm never letting him go again.' Edward thought as he turned on his side, falling asleep with a smile on his face.

 **I believe Ed can now be considered a lovestruck bonehead. This was fun to write and I hope you all enjoyed! There will be some romance hopefully next chapter because Ed is a flirt! ;)**


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